How to talk about weight loss

The issue of discussing weight with overweight people is still controversial. While some believe that overweight peo­ple should be offered encouragement to lose weight, others are concerned about fat shaming and the emotional damage that can result in someone being valued by the pound.

First, it’s important to consider wheth­er or not addressing the issue is neces­sary to begin with. What is the relation­ship you have with this person and how overweight are they? If your dad has been gaining weight, so much so that it’s start­ing to affect his health, then you would have every reason to raise the subject. You have a close relationship with him so it’s reasonable for you to be concerned about his weight. His weight is also high enough to be affecting his health, which is also a major reason for concern. How­ever, if you give unsolicited weight loss advice to a woman you meet at a party, this isn’t helpful. You have neither the knowledge of her health or weight his­tory, let alone an established relationship that would allow her to trust discussing a sensitive topic with you.

This is where the element of mental health becomes apparent. In our culture, skinny is already held as the ideal beauty standard. Overweight people rarely see any models or media figures that have body types similar to theirs. This means that personal critique of their body fat can result in severe mental health issues, such as body dysmorphia and depres­sion. Some begin to obsess about their body fat and may obsessively exercise or develop eating disorders in order to “cor­rect” their body.

On the other hand, weight loss can be a very important discussion to have with someone. Losing weight can be a very difficult process—people find change to their daily routine stressful, and weight loss requires a lot of it. Weight loss means changing your diet from some­thing easier, like fast food, to something more time-consuming or expensive, as well as regular exercise (which also tends to be time-consuming). Friends and fam­ily members can be great sources of mo­tivation for individuals who need to lose weight for health reasons. You can also provide someone with a healthier out­look on weight loss. When discussing the subject, you should focus less on appear­ance and more on the benefits of being physically fit, such as increased energy, lowering the chance of unwanted physi­cal strain and promoting healthier organ function.

Additionally, weight loss can provide many positive social opportunities in someone’s life. Some may choose to take up team sports to lose weight, which encourages peer bonding, competition and pride associated with your body’s abilities. Others may begin a vegetarian/ vegan diet and become involved in the activism of those communities.

In the end, the most important thing to remember is that you can’t dictate what another person does with their body. While it may be a good idea to discuss healthy weight loss options with a friend, you have to keep in mind that your words have power. Any discussion of weight loss should focus on methods that are safe and encourage a positive re­lationship with one’s body. Keep in mind that some people may be comfortable with their bodies the way they are, oth­ers may welcome a chat about shedding a few pounds. Everybody has value and no one is determined by his or her BMI.