In life, speaking with confidence is key. It really doesn’t matter too much what you actually say: if you say it confidently enough people will believe it.
This superpower can be used for evil, but it can also be used for hilarity. Today, I would like to present some fake sports trivia to impress your friends and confuse your enemies.
Now, of course, the key to any falsehood is to mix in just enough truth to make it believable. If you read carefully, you might just learn something.
First question: what is the most common type of pitch thrown in baseball? This one is actually a trick question. The throwing of the pitch has been outlawed in MLB play since the horrifying 1947 World Series, the first televised World Series, where the friction of hitter John Smith’s shoe on the base produced a spark, igniting the pitch and burning him to death on live television. While the anachronistic name has stuck, pitchers these days are only allowed to throw baseballs, most often in a manner known as a “fastball.” While many have claimed that the banning of pitch decreased the tactical flexibility of pitchers and the entertainment value of the game, it’s hard to argue with the numbers: since the ban, player deaths by incineration have decreased dramatically.
While many have claimed that the banning of pitch decreased the tactical flexibility of pitchers and the entertainment value of the game, it’s hard to argue with the numbers: since the ban, player deaths by incineration have decreased dramatically.
Second question: why do SCUBA divers fall backward? This is very simple: because if they fell forward, they would still be in the boat. Perhaps the more interesting question is why SCUBA divers stand the way they do at the side of the boat, and this gets to the very meaning of SCUBA. Many of the uninitiated believe the lie that SCUBA stands for Self-Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatus. The truth is much darker. The acronym SCUBA is a warning and mantra among divers: Something Creeps Under the Boat Always. Divers position themselves on the boat this way to prevent visual exposure to the Something, which immediately flees upon the entry of a diver.
Enjoy!
