Student Newspaper at Michigan Tech University since 1921

Published Weekly on Tuesdays Office Located in Walker 105

Lewd special satirical article: Staff Highlight Walter White

The recent success of the chemistry department can be partially attributed to the newest chemistry professor, Walter White, especially with the new breakthroughs in his research with crystalline structures. 

Although he has a very crime-riddled past, the Michigan Tech Department of Chemistry needed to make a change in the way that the classes are taught, so they hired Professor White. He will be teaching Advanced Organic Chemistry: Synthesis next semester. The lab portion of that class will mainly focus on cooking methamphetamine: in this course, students will learn how to make the purest methamphetamine ever. 

On the subject of the labs in the class, Professor White said “You can learn more about precision and control from synthesizing methamphetamine than from a hundred ordinary lab experiments.” Compared to most of the other classes offered, his class will educate you on making the most structurally stable compounds that one could possibly make.

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