Live like the Dean!

Insider reveals his weekly schedule

#HuskyShame, Piss Editor

The Lewd was recently given top-secret information onto the Dean’s weekly schedule. Thanks to an informant insider, we have given you a unique glance as to the Dean’s weekly schedule!

 

Please note: Times for events are not listed. The Dean is a free spirit who surpasses the mortal theory of time. 

 

Monday

Wish Huskies a great week on Instagram

Eat first bucket of shrimp for the week

Brainstorm new hashtags

Listen to complaints from students about how “there’s nothing to do here”

Attend boring meetings

Hit the gym, get swole

 

Tuesday

Follow several new Michigan Tech students on Instagram

Meet with administrators, ask them to redistribute more funding to things that improve quality of student life; #HuskyFail

Attend depressing meetings

Hit the gym, get ripped

 

Wednesday

Welcome students to the Dean’s Club via Instagram DM

Attend USG meeting; commandeer pretzels

Eat second bucket of shrimp

Hit the gym, get jacked

 

Thursday

Read The Lewd

Consider making a Dean TikTok account

Attend [redacted] meetings

Comment on students’ Instagram posts

Contemplate

Hit the gym, get buff

 

Friday

Support student orgs on Instagram

Rejoice

Attend fun meetings because everything is fun on Friday (if you’re the dean)

Keg stands with the Greek lifers

Hit the gym, try not to fall off of the elliptical after too many keg stands

 

Saturday

“Like” Time

Engage in “Yooper” activities, such as: eating a pasty, playing in the snow, sweating in a sauna, driving over potholes, crying

Reject intimate encounter with Mrs. The Dean. #HuskyUP

Hit the gym, get beefed

 

Sunday

Make waffles

Repent

Rest

Repent

Rest

Instagram time

Prepare for doom of oncoming week